Thursday 1/07/09
January 6, 2010 in Uncategorized
6 Rounds
5 Clean & Jerk 135#/85#
10 Knees to Elbows
15 Sandbag Slams
10 Tips to Stop Your Knees from Popping and Cracking
Better Squatting
Strength Standards for Women
Strong Girls
January 6, 2010 in Uncategorized
6 Rounds
5 Clean & Jerk 135#/85#
10 Knees to Elbows
15 Sandbag Slams
10 Tips to Stop Your Knees from Popping and Cracking
Better Squatting
Strength Standards for Women
Strong Girls
all right…is 10 aPM.. been drinking Paleo wine, feelin no pain…but still…I gotta ask:.
How come no one commented on the “check out my package” picture? C’mon…Flip, Natalie…NO ONE….
I know is was inadvertent, but as someone who finds humor in everything…WTF…has the humor quotient DROPPED? Well, lets see what I can do…
Lets hit the WOD:
Since my goal to get kicked out of EVERY gyn in Indy, I must say, that I have failed you dear reader…not through lack of effort I assure you…but more places were either too empty or to hardcore (yes they r out there- old school gyms where Olympic lifts are appreciated- even when my F’d up self does them- relax Ben, I am kidding…but NO ONE believes the Sumo Deadlift- high pull is a real movement- just FYI…
I have made near grown men cry with this movement and the TOTAL athlete speech…F*#K I have become cocky in some of these gerbil farms we call modern gyms… I mean I LOVE being the ‘idiot’ in my queer (not gay- look it up jackass)
5 finger shoes (YES I know they are HIDEOUS..but have you seen my calves? Holy si#@…they WORK.) doing crazy things no one else is willing to do- I actually heard a guy tonight say- “That pullup doesn’t count cuz he cheated” (I ‘Kipped’- but at the top held it as long as I could) and I have been challenging people who are doing squats to do 2 things:
1- GET OFF THE SMITH MACHINE- it is the worst thing EVER invented
2- Try that barefoot…
Wait…,this isn’t the WOD commentary…OK here it is (I go off of what is posted on the web):
For my warmup I guess, I did 3 rounds of:
100 singles or 10 doubles (Don’t ask the strange ass looks I get when I break out the jumprope…)
20 step ups (24 inch- this was the stage in the aerobics room at the ‘LIFESTYLE FITNESS’ in Greenwood IN- which I may actually join (for FREE cuz their manager wants to learn crossfit and is apparently too stupid to figure out the internet- so I’ll act like I am GODS gift to crossfit and take ALL credit before I drop the website on him…and I DO want to do the certification in april but have NO CLUE if I am ready…where was I…oh yeah…warm up…
20 overhead squats with the 10 pound aerobic bar
20 arm swings
Then (as the body fit class was assembling at 545PM foir the 6PM class in the same room- I made sure to put extra effort for the room full of ladies who, appearantly, have never seen a real man break a sweat and I added a bunch of push ups at the end cuz I got good arms- according to my old morning crew …but I digress and my ego grows (I am SOOOOO gonna regret this post in the AM….)
And I head out to do the 1 DL every min for 10 min…
I start at 225, for 5 to ensure I am warmed up the add another 90 pounds till I got to 315 then used that weight…and lets say that I had no choice but to lift it because I put it on the bar and in this place (at least the free weight section- which is like a free-fire zone in the mid east (no rules really) if it hits the bar- you lift it- so I did 7 times in 7 min then I added 5 pounds to each side for the remainder…and my hernia may be coming, but tonight..I am king of the friggen world).
So the 10 in 10 complete I went to the WOD and the 3 rounds
10 pull ups
15 push ups
20 situps
25 squats
Now if you have not noticed, in most ‘fitness centers the pull up bar diesnt exist and you have pull up hand grips- and I don’t mean bar- NO ONE has Bars) are either on the DIP/AB/Pull up contraption that DCCF apparently only uses to shackle dogs to or allow emasculated males to do KTE’s on (and I am AMONG YOU) or they are mounted to some large pulley piece of equipment that you do cable movements (in this case-triceps pushdowns, LAT pull downs, the ROW (Stop laughing) bicep curls and all manner of cable cross over’s for the chest).
I, in full on “get the f’ out of my way” mode strode over to some jackass doing cable cross-overs in a (I swear I can’t make this shit up – he had no neck, wore a cut up sweatshirt like Jennifer Beals in Flash Dance, high top ASICS wrestling boots, red spandex shorts and a weightlifting belt- was EASILY 60 pounds overweight, balding AND drinking some sort of ‘workout drink’ he kept shaking as I did my pull ups- VERY F’n annoying- but hey, he could move the ENTIRE stack of weights about half way- (Which INCLINED me to prove to him that I could not only do this but make it look easy- and I may have torn a PEC, cuz I did it AFTER my last set of pull ups- but screw him- he had it comming and needed to know he was my bitch, that I could beat his old ass (hell he may have been younger than me…though this reminds me of something I read in the gym and I KNOW I have it wrong but damn if I don’t try to live it since reading it:
“I can do what you do better than you
I can do what I do better than most and
I can do what neither of us can do better than anyone else…”
Shit where was I….damn 1998 Chianti Classico… oh yeah
There was a trainer ‘training’ two girls on LAT pull downs cuz according to him “there is no better movement for developing your back” he got annoyed that my ‘kipping’ was shaking the whole damn thing- but he didn’t say anything to me.
15 push ups
20 sit-ups (used the 100LB dumbbells to anchor my feet- just to make a point to the muscle beach wanna be’s that I could move them effectively and with little effort- see hernia referenced earlier- cuz I may never have sex again… : (…..
25 squats
I did it in 9: 49 and I am damn proud of that time all things considered….
However
I will point out, that while there MAY have been a door nearby (closer than a trach can, appearantly, at some of these facilities, EMERGENCY Exits ARE actually hooked up to alarm systems….so as I made a dash for the door and hit the handle and the damn alarm went off- the ENTIRE, I donno, I guess 15 THOUSAND square foot facility came to a halt…and was looking at me as I stood outside in the 0 degrees catching my breath waiting for the though of vomiting to pass, LAT boy came over and asked me to come back in….which I obliged, thinking I was done at this gym, only to have the manager come over and say that that was great…no one has come that clost to puking in his gum in a LONG time…
I think I like this place…
See you Friday AM if all goes well…but I may need a couch to crash on..
Ed
haha, great post!
I’m so in love with the girl from the video.
Ed, I sure miss your posts…this one made up for lost time. Thanks!
so nice to hear from ed.. though i may have barfed a little in my mouth reading of the man in the red spandex
also to the morning girls- i will no longer be “dropping it like its hot” as I think I pulled a hammy or some other ass/leg muscle that i didnt know i had.. i am such a freakin spaz…
great wod this morning…
second shark’s post-that girl was gorgeous.
ed – I love Flash Dance! I actually dont remember seeing the previous post you talked about, now I gotta go find it.
have fun teaching the gym rats Xfit.
I just wanna say I think thats is freakin hilarious!!!!!!!! Ed, the humor is not lost just your posts are few and far between, just because your not here in body all the time, doesn’t mean you cant be here in spirit…..so I am gonna need a post like this every day that you are not here, but also when you are here too….so basically every day!!!!!
i am in love with her too.
get your own crush, brown